I Caught Myself Doing It Again…

crappy happy

Yep, I caught myself doing it again…being a big, fat negative loser this morning. Let me bring you up to speed…

So my 9 year old tells me at 6:10 this morning that, “Oh yeah Mom, our field trip got rescheduled for TODAY! I’m so excited…and we have to be to the bus depot by 7:30. Can I have a banana?” What the what? Now the race is on. It’s too late to have the 2 younger girls get ready fast enough to make the bus, plus I need to drop off cake pops for Teacher Appreciation day anyway…so I guess they are going to be late. Sigh…there goes my perfect record.

Lunches made, hair braided, dogs walked and fed, big kids out the door to the bus…pause to remember to breathe…oh, and I guess I have to get dressed this morning. No jammies when you have to actually go into the school. Crap! Ok, breathe again…throw some clothes on (do you think anyone will notice if they were the same ones I had on yesterday? Nope, me neither…I’m going with it!). Shoes? Check. Did you tie them…nope, give me a minute…ok, tied! Check.

Out the door and down the street on time, then the fight over the iPod starts. I roll down my window to drown out the fighting. Then I think to myself, “Did I put on a bra? Whew, check!” Nathan picks a song, Anna mumbles something snarky because she doesn’t like it. I turn the radio up. I can feel Anna’s snotty glare burning a hole in the side of my head. I turn it up even louder.

Finally at the bus depot…along with the other 40,000 parents and sugared up, pop tart eating 9 year olds. I whip my mini-school bus into the last parking spot and do my happy dance before I leap out of the truck to run Nathan in to meet his class. We wait…and wait. I look outside and notice the buses have lined themselves up neatly right behind my truck. My happy dance is no longer relevant now that I realize I am parked in. Epic parking fail. Drop the boy off with his teacher and I run back to the truck. The girls are pissed because they are going to be late. I try pulling out my mad ninja driving moves, determined to get my truck out of the twinkie sized parking spot I was in so as not to ruin my “never got the kids late to school” entry on my list of things I did right in my life. No dice. Crap. So we wait…and here it comes…the bitchy rant.

Yep kids, I did it. I caught myself in that moment complaining about everything that morning. The poor planning for the field trip, the buses parking me in, Nathan not telling me that they rescheduled the trip, the kids being late to school, me having to actually get dressed…the whole thing. Every little nit-noid crappy thing that happened this morning I was griping and complaining about. And the windows were open. And there was a dad parked next to me chatting it up with his little girl as they waited patiently for the buses to move. Yep, I felt like a turd. But wait, it gets better…

“Ya want me to back your truck out for ya?” the dad says to me. Oh wow, now I really feel like crap. He must have heard me complaining and either A) He wants me gone so he doesn’t have to listen to me anymore or B) He’s just a nice guy wanting to help an overwhelmed mom out. “Ya think you can? I tried but I thought I was going to hit the bus” I yell back at him. He smiles at me and nods “Yep, no problem.” I hop out of the truck and he gets in, eases my truck out of the twinkie sized spot and throws her into park. (On a side note, I pride myself in the fact that I can handle that Suburban as well as the next guy. This guy must work at a car dealership or body shop or something…definitely a pro.) He hops out, gives me a wink and I thank him. I was going to throw him a cake pop but I still had time to get the girls to school on time so I just left.

Happy dance once again until it dawns on me…first of all, he was nice enough to help me out when I was being a crap head. God does send angels when we need them most. Secondly, I start thinking about stuff like the times when my truck wasn’t running and how hard it was to manage without a vehicle, especially with Tom gone. This morning my truck was working fine…another blessing. Then I think, ya know what…I got to drop my babies off at school this morning and have that time with them. Most other parents don’t work from home…or maybe their child has passed away and they don’t have those opportunities. I bet they would have loved to have one more chance to take their kids to school, tardy or not.

Lesson learned. All in all this was a FABULOUS morning. Blessings abound! Good people still exist! My boy is on the field trip of his life! My girls get to give cake pops to their teachers! And I am home writing…doing what I love and sharing all of it with you! Crappy or happy…we always get to decide!

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